Outsourcing clients results in better service In an efffort to deliver better service and fulfill its mission, a local health charity is replacing its regular clients with outsourced clients from the Third World.
"We found that it is just too hard to serve the needs of the poor and sick here in Metro," said Bleeding Hearts Health Care Executive Director Bernice Snidely. "By replacing them with client from Africa or South America we can do more and spend less. Plus, we don't have to smell them."
Local clients will be discharged from the service and replaced with needy and deserving clients from Ivory Coast, Peru, Somalia and Lichtenstien. To meet Federal standards, the new clients will all be refered to as "Chuck" or "Mary" even if their name is "Pedro" or "Machete".
"We can solve the problems of a small village in Africa so much easier than one of our clients here in Metro. It takes half the money, and they're so grateful."